Doomsday Preppers: Tyler Smith

Season three continues with the episode ‘We Are the Marauders’, a title that thankfully only applies to one of the folks profiled.
Like I said at the beginning of the season, unless I see good things (demonstrating positive, life-affirming attitudes, progressive thinking, and real solutions) or jumping-off points for serious issues that need discussing, I’m keeping these short. And unfortunately, this guy’s profile is probably the least ‘good’ we’ve seen yet.

© NatGeo/Sharp Entertainment

All the production values and dramatic lighting in the world can’t disguise the fact that he has a BudK hunting knife bolted to his arm.

The short and sweet version goes like this: Tyler Smith (and a group of his family/friends/neighbors) apparently has no interest in increasing his disaster preparedness by stockpiling beans, bullets, and band-aids. Instead, he’s got it in his head to be a ‘marauder’ (of the sort regular survivalist guys always bring up as the reason they have fortified bunkers and multiple firearms per person)…and to broadcast this intention on television.

Although it’s not mentioned on the show, a little digging reveals that Tyler “is the leader of Spartan Survival”, a group “founded…in 2005 to train and prepare others on survivalism” with “more than 80 dues-paying members.” Note that he’s not described as the Owner or Instructor of his outfit, like you might see with someone with a legitimate wilderness survival school like Cody Lundin’s Aboriginal Living Skills School or Creek Stewart’s Willow Haven Outdoor. Similarly, such actual schools have paying students, not “dues-paying members”. Basically, what this boils down to is that Tyler has managed to put together his own personal local militia, with himself installed at the top. How he managed to sucker in so many people is beyond me, because he creeps me right the fuck out. Oh well, “hard times flush the chumps”, or something.

And hey, while we’re talking ‘marauders’, here’s some food for thought from Cormac McCarthy on the type of post-disaster-warlord private army I’m sure ol’ Tyler would love to rule.

He woke in the morning and turned over in the blanket and looked back down the road through the trees the way they’d come in time to see the marchers appear four abreast. Dressed in clothing of every description, all wearing red scarves at their necks. Red or orange, as close to red as they could find. … An army in tennis shoes, tramping. Carrying three-foot lengths of pipe with leather wrappings. Lanyards at the wrist. Some of the pipes were threaded through with lengths of chain fitted at their ends with every manner of bludgeon. They clanked past, marching with a swaying gait like wind-up toys. Bearded, their breath smoking through their masks. The phalanx following carried spears or lances tasseled with ribbons, the long blades hammered out of trucksprings in some crude forge up-country. They passed two hundred feet away, the ground shuddering lightly. Tramping. Behind them came wagons drawn by slaves in harness and piled with goods of war and after that the women, perhaps a dozen in number, some of them pregnant, and lastly a supplementary consort of catamites illclothed against the cold and fitted in dogcollars and yoked each to each. All passed on.

 Anyway, why he believes it’s necessary to be a roving band of marauders is beyond me, seeing how he claims to have a fifteen-acre rural property, which could probably very easily be converted into a self-reliant off-grid compound, doing away with the need to wander in search of supplies.

Oh, and they have three kids—aged three, two, and one newborn—which brings to mind the term ‘brood mare’. Of course, the latest one is still in utero during the segment, so if you like getting the willies, just think about this guy giving a DIY cesarean in the barn. Really. I trust this guy about as far as I could throw him.

Now, because his survival plan is to simply roam around and help himself to other folks’ stuff—and said folks wanting said stuff for themselves—he expects to get shot at. And instead of letting that possibility act as the impetus to reassess his survival plan, he decides to enlist the help of his skeezy cousin Jesse Pinkman Chris and make some homemade ‘body armor’.
His wife asks him if he’s going to build her a suit of armor, too? Tyler indicatively replies, “No, you’re going to be a stay-at-home prepper, dealing with all the stuff I kill” Of course! Because a societal collapse couldn’t also mean collapse of patriarchy, enforced outdated gender roles, and macho posturing, right?
Their recipe involves woven fiberglass, bathroom tiles, roofing tar, and of course, duct tape.
Honestly, I’m confused…because it looks like once they make their (not-)bulletproof tiles, then they go ahead an make a ‘suit’ out of steel plate and some mesh stuff? Anyway, it’s about what you’d expect from guys who not only don’t know what they’re doing, but also have no sense of aesthetics (I have a very bad feeling that such postapocalyptic function-before-form will be the death of craftsmanship as we know it). Tyler puts on the ‘suit of body armor’ and cousin sycophant proceeds to ‘test’ it by hitting with rocks, pipes, and a 12-gauge shot across the bow…which is to say, he never comes close to actually shooting him. Some have suggested they actually took the shot out of the shell.

In the end, despite his overcompensating and posturing as a hardcore, ultimate badass survivalist ‘apex predator’…I don’t think anyone is afraid of Tyler. Thankfully, the general interwebs consensus seems to be that “He’s an asshat”, as well.

And so, folks living around Tacoma, Washington, you’ve been warned. You’ve got a volatile idiot in your midst. Take care.

Advertisements

13 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Charles on 16 November, 2013 at 08:05

    My friends as well as myself know about these assholes and they are in our crosshairs.

    Reply

    • The 15 acres they are on was recently being rented by my household. We were still living there when they first filmed on the property. We were informed by Smith and the landowner that we had no rights as the renters to prevent having over a dozen armed individuals camping on the property, potentially for days, with no preparations for sanitation. Instead they attempted to demand access to the house and power. They set up a door in the field to practice home invasions. Smith and his band proceeded to make threats, I.E. stating loudly near the house “We should just shoot them and get it over with” and telling us they would take possession of the property “by any means necessary”. All the while they circled the house with rifles which were kept pointed at our home, allowed their dog to harass my ducks and geese, blocked the driveway and drove their trucks through a seasonal wetland. We felt no option but to move out (there are also a lot of safety issues with the house that the owner failed to address and it was becoming apparent that he no intention of doing so.) As we were in the process moving out Smith and his cronies took turns, showing up every few hours to see/ask if we were out yet. Smith asked one member of our household if we had left anything valuable behind.

      Reply

  2. Posted by Frank on 16 November, 2013 at 11:58

    My wife and I talked about this show immediately after viewing the stupid episode. Our conclusion was that their fierce leader would be shot in his nuts on their very first raid and would scream and cry like a little girl and beg for mercy!

    Reply

    • Posted by Charles on 17 November, 2013 at 09:23

      I agree so much with your comment! I’ll even bet he was one of the kids beat up everyday after school. I can see him now a torn shirt mud all over his face and snot running down as he sits on the school play ground wimpering.

      Reply

  3. Posted by semperfipain@aol.com on 17 November, 2013 at 00:21

    Its sad that he has reproduced and spread his seed. Whats worse is he found a mate to do it with. Poor bastard will be the first one with cross hairs on his head. He must be a lunitic to advertise he is going to kill and pillage people if something should happen. Even stupid people wouldn’t advertise that.

    Reply

  4. Posted by AirborneEd on 18 November, 2013 at 15:55

    This jackass will be dead in less than 24 hours. Maybe he should spend a night in the IronBound in Newark NJ for a night to test his tactical knowledge. Dumb-ass.

    Reply

  5. Posted by semperfipain@aol.com on 18 November, 2013 at 22:03

    This show has generated so much revenue for the people who are selling prepping equipment and food. Have to admit its a gold mine and the person behind this creative prepper show is basking in the rewards this show has brought him and others. Guess when you have a president such as we have, people feel unsafe even in the borders of this once great nation. We are number one in overweight people, people who have seen UFO’s and the largest debt. When are we as a whole going to stand up and say enough is enough and take this country back to being number one other than holding the record of overweight people. Remember the Pledge of Allegiance? One country under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all. Sorry for the random thoughts.

    Reply

  6. Posted by Richard Noggin on 26 November, 2013 at 19:28

    Tyler Smith, you are a fat, f***ing idiot!!! You are a disgrace, and you are a dangerous individual. you are not dangerous to me, or to those who you think you will conquer. You are a danger to your wife and family!!! Your homemade armor is nothing more than a joke, and your “skills” will get your group killed. The people that have paid your bullspit fee to be part of your Dungeons and Dragons group, are nothing more than cannon fodder. You will not make it past the first two days in your “marauding.”

    Reply

  7. Posted by Bobby on 27 November, 2013 at 14:17

    A thief like Tyler is truly the lowest level of scum humanly possible. Absolute garbage!

    Reply

  8. Genuinely, this episode really negated the “Doomsday” episodes for me. I know their hardly legitimate to further the discussion and prey on making people look totally ridiculous. But Smith is a total idiot. Up in that area there is a lot of ex-military that would NOT tolerate his antics in a SHTF scenario. Moreover, most preppers have at least one high-caliber rifle (typically in the AR or AK variety). His piddly-ass body armor is clearly NOT military grade, has a small level of coverage, and frankly will suffice only to make an imposing appearance. The first real level of resistance he makes, he will likely take a .308 round to his arms, legs, or waist that will hopefully prove fatal. The downside to this is idiots like this benefit from a “civil” society as they spread their message and hate. If you live up in that area – good luck.

    Reply

  9. Smith is also a convicted child molester and has now been arrested for arms violation and failing to register as an offender. How appropriate for him. It couldn’t happen to a better Asshole.

    http://www.springfieldnewssun.com/news/news/national/doomsday-preppers-arrested-illegal-fir/ncqYt/

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: